The other day I bumped into a former coachee who casually asked me a question that set me thinking. We had met after years and caught up for an impromptu coffee and chat at a nearby café that was thankfully almost empty. After the usual small talk that creeps into every conversation nowadays, we got around to discussing her work and mine.

The young lady seemed unhappy with her workplace and in particular her Boss who she saw as aloof and someone who was one way at work but whose true personality emerged outside of it. That was when she tossed me the question that got me thinking, looking within, and driving me to share my thoughts in this article.

“So, what would you call your style of leadership, Antje?”, she asked.

I had never really put a label to it, but this was perhaps a good time to do so. As I stared into the coffee cup almost as if it held the answer to the question, I found myself saying, “Authentic leadership.” Wait a minute, with one sweeping statement did I just crown myself with a hallowed word? From the expression on my coachee’s face and the fact that she was nodding her head in agreement while wanting me to elaborate, it didn’t seem so.

The nuances of Authentic Leadership

Let’s take a deeper look at authentic leadership and how leaders exhibit it. Authentic leaders show their true selves to others. They think and act the same way in private and in public. They reveal their mistakes or flaws and don’t mind looking weak. The most important aspect is that they accept themselves and others as they are and know that everyone including themselves are works in progress. By being aware of their strengths, limitations, and emotions they are willing to make changes in themselves.

Authentic leadership is about leading from the heart, and not just the mind. Therefore, authentic leaders communicate with empathy and connect with co-workers on an emotional level.

An authentic leader puts long-term goals of an organisation ahead of their personal interest. They pursue a greater purpose and attain their own fulfilment in a way that is aligned to the company’s development.

Coming back to my own experience, many of those I have coached tell me that they maintain a different persona at work and another in their private lives. For instance, some of them don’t want to make friends at the workplace or talk about their interests whoever passionate they may be about it.

I always share my personal example with these people telling them that it took me well past the age of 40 to be able to integrate the two personas I maintained.  It was only once I started to reveal more about myself – my interests, my love for Nature, my various work stints, being a vegetarian, my brush with theatre and even a course in Theology - that I began to feel more complete at work. These aspects revealed my true self to others who then began to relate to me differently. They saw me for who I was and not for who I was trying to be.

My self-actualization has given me immense benefits and deep confidence. I try to encourage my coachees to reveal their actual selves at their workplace. Of course, it isn’t easy and takes a shift in mindset. I have also realized that it is something that comes with age and maturity. As I sign off on these thoughts, I must say that coffee is certainly a great stimulator.

What are your thoughts on authentic leadership? I look forward to hearing about them.